Code Of Conduct

Our Rules

At The Bate Mates, all members must follow these guidelines at all times. Attending any event or meetup means you agree to the terms of this code.
*Last Update Feb 26, 2026

1. Accessing The Events

• Must be adult men over the age of 18, either cisgender or trans-masculine.

• All participants attend of their own free will and are required to register to access meetups.
  It's a private space for male socializing and intimate nude recreation, where consensual nudity and masturbation may occur.

• This is a private, invite-only club, not open to the public.

• All interactions are consensual and not conducted for sexual services.
  The space and meetups are provided for members to connect; sexual acts are neither facilitated nor offered.

• Contributions are required to cover event expenses and ongoing growth.
  Including space, amenities, supplies, cleaning, laundry, online services, and the time and effort involved in organizing and hosting.

• Anyone showing signs of intoxication or being under the influence will not be admitted.

• No smoking.
  Either cigarettes, weed, or any other substances. Vapes only outdoors, please.

• No Alcohol or Liquor of any kind is allowed.
  Unless it’s a special event where 'BYOB' (Bring Your Own Booze) is clearly mentioned ahead of time.

• No filming, recording, pictures of any kind at any moment.
  Only team members may use devices for event operations. Official photos/videos may be taken with the consent of everyone involved. 

• No objects that could pose a risk to others.

• Cock rings or ball stretchers are welcome. No other toys.
  To preserve health and safety, no masturbation toys, sleeves, fleshlights, extenders, or similar items are permitted. 

• No uninvited guests allowed.
  Respect the Circle, the Club, and the Host.

• No sex work, solicitation, prostitution - whether explicit or implied.
  This is not part of our culture, mission, or community.

• Events Late Arrival and Non-Attendance Policy
  Members arriving after the designated entry window may be denied access, and any required contributions will not be refunded. The same applies to no-shows.
  
  
  

2. Actions, Respect, and Consent

• Consent always comes first and can be revoked at any time! 'No' means No. 'Maybe' always means No.

• Always ask for permission before engaging in any touch or interaction.
  A light gesture or a polite ‘May I?’ is all that’s needed. Always approach someone respectfully.

• Respond politely, such as with a "Yeah, man", a nod, or "No, thanks" with a smile.

• Don’t act like a jerk! Leave your ego outside the space.
  This is the only 'jerk' move we don’t want here!

• Never push, pressure, or intimidate anyone about your preferences, including timing to finish.

• Never repeatedly or persistently follow members around in an attempt to initiate interaction.
  Respect their body language and do not make others uncomfortable.

• No anal contact is allowed, including self-touch.
  We also want to maintain a clean, odor-free environment.

• Side play is ok, but oral interactions must be moderated due to health concerns.
  Other interactions such as Kissing, Nips Nibbling, Armpit Licking, are allowed and encouraged.

• No anal play. Any form of penetration contact, including fingering and rimming, is not allowed.
  This applies to all attendees regardless of anatomy. 

• Swallowing or oral/anal contact with semen is prohibited.

• Minimize talking in the play area.
  Avoid interrupting or distracting others. Please use social areas for talking. 

• Use your words to give a clear verbal warning before ejaculating
  Don't just rely on heavy breathing.

• Speak up — your boundaries are your responsibility.
  Communicate your needs, desires, and boundaries clearly and respectfully. Also, honor the boundaries and comfort zones of others.

• Flirting is highly encouraged, as long as it’s respectful.
  Smiling and checking in with your bros to make sure they’re having fun is a good vibe.

ALWAYS REMEMBER:

• Do not touch anyone without clear, explicit consent — especially from behind.

• If someone is unresponsive, not interested, or avoiding eye contact, disengage. Do not follow or insist.

• Approach individuals or groups with awareness, avoiding interruption of their experience.

• Avoid loud or extended conversations in the play area — please use other social spaces.

• Do not intentionally test boundaries. Group will noticed and address it.

• Report any concerning behavior to the team ASAP. We are building a solid group, and the space is meant to be enjoyed free from disturbance, annoyance, or disrespect.
  
  
  

3. Illness, Cleanliness, and Hygiene

• Never attend a meetup if you are not feeling well. Members must be free of any disease or condition that could pose a health risk to others, such as rashes, sores, fever, cough, respiratory infections, sniffles, staph infections, herpes outbreaks, or any other symptoms that could indicate illness.

• All members must present themselves healthy, clean, and with the best hygiene practices, including:

  • Body clean: Fresh and odor-free. Skip strong fragrances or colognes, and never carry smoke scents.

  • Hands clean: With fingernails trimmed and smooth.

  • Teeth brushed: Bad breath is a bone killer. We might provide mouthwash; however, members should do their part beforehand. Using gum/mints can help to remain fresh.

  • Start each event with a trip to the washroom. Wash hands and use mouthwash, regardless of whether you feel it’s necessary. 

• Clean up after themselves (e.g., spills, semen, lube, or if you missed the toilet for example).
  Keep space and washrooms spotless. Inform a Team Member if anything needs attention or lacks essentials.

• Participants must maintain cleanliness, both during and after events.
  Help keep the space tidy. Trash in the bin; used towels in the hamper.

• Keep greasy hands off the walls, furniture, equipment, curtains, storage areas, etc.
  
  
  

4. Welcoming and Inclusive Space

• Every member has the right to feel safe, comfortable, heard, and respected.
  Discrimination, harassment, and exclusion based on race, origin, orientation, body type, or any other characteristic are not tolerated.

• We actively promote inclusivity and celebrate the diverse expressions of masculinity and sexuality.

• Always be kind. Leave your ego out of the game play.

• Support the Circle: Help new participants feel welcome. We often have men attending for the first time.

• Our meetups are carefully organized to create a supportive, comfortable, and pressure-free environment for men to grow, relax, and explore.
  
  
  

5. Accountability and Community Standards

• If you see any inappropriate behavior or someone making others uncomfortable, speak up.
  Our community is strong because we hold each other accountable.

• Anything that violates the safety, comfort, or trust of others will result in immediate action, including warnings or removal.

• Any form of abuse — whether verbal, emotional, or physical — will not be tolerated.
  
  
  

6. Confidentiality, Privacy, Anonymity, and Trust

What happens at The Bate Mates stays at The Bate Mates.

• Never disclose the identity or personal information of any member or guest to anyone outside the club.

• What happens or is shared in the club must be kept strictly confidential.

• It is strictly prohibited to reveal or share the location of any club events, meetups, or activities with outsiders. 

• Members must respect each other’s personal journeys and everyone’s experiences.
  
  
  

7. Zero Tolerance for Drugs, Intoxication, Soliciting, or Suspicious Behavior

Zero tolerance for drugs of any kind, intoxication, sexual services, or any suspicious behavior.

• Members must comply with all applicable laws; any illegal behavior will be reported to authorities.

• Such members will receive an immediate warning, and depending on the severity, may be subject to a ban from future events.

• Members found in violation will not be eligible for refunds of any collected contributions or memberships.

8. No Tolerance for Gossip, Drama, or False Narratives

• Members must not initiate or spread unverified information, personal attacks, or anything that may harm someone’s reputation.

• Concerns should be handled directly with the person involved or reported to club leadership.

• Deliberate attempts to damage a member’s reputation through lies, gossip, rumor-mongering, embellished stories, or selective disclosure are a serious breach of community standards and will result in suspension or removal.

9. Respect for the Neighbors and the Space

Maintain discretion and respect , whether during events or casual member hangouts. 

• Be considerate of the noise level and avoid disruptive behaviors inside or outside the space.

10. Priority for Active Members in Overbooked Events

• For events where space may be limited and more members want to attend than available spots, members who are more active in the club will have priority for attendance.
  Most engaged members get the first opportunity to participate when space is tight.

A Note on Culture

We value a healthy lifestyle both physically and mentally.
Know your status. Get tested regularly and avoid behaviors that put your health or others’ at risk.
Stay active and practice self-care. Build emotional intelligence, remain open to growth, and ask for support when needed.
Uplift one another and help foster a respectful, supportive atmosphere—both during events and beyond.
Support each other’s journey toward self-improvement, exploration, and well-being.
Share experiences and advice that encourage growth, connection, and confidence. Men experience vulnerability too, and we grow stronger by supporting one another.

If you have any questions or concerns about the Community Code of Conduct, please don’t hesitate to reach out to a member of our leadership team or use the Contact form on our website www.thebatemates.com

* Last update includes:

Content has been summarized for clarity and ease of reading.